Part 2 of Tackling ACCEPTANCE that my illness is chronic

Welcome to part 2 of ‘how I’m how I’m actually going to accept the challenge of having a disability that can’t be seen and not being able to live the active lifestyle I used to.’ Well, starting with that active lifestyle. I first fell in love with competitive swimming and did that despite burns and epilepsy; I suppose I was above average, but I had what is called grit:

         and this  

 

I was always doing something, so imagine my dismay and shift in the way I thought about life, when I had to come to a grinding halt, mainly because of lupus and Sjogren’s Syndrome, Shrinking Lung Syndrom and Pulmonary Hypertension and osteonecrosis.

First, I need CONVINCING that my life has changed and is likely not to return to the life I know. But, the need is to convince myself; I need to be totally honest with myself and realize that the days I once knew are gone-FOR GOOD. But, and I emphasize the ‘but’ here, I need to realize that this is not a bad thing (I’m developing clarity as I write about this issue).

Then, I find the things that I already do (like this blog) and decide that I’m going to put work into it. Or, it has always been suggested that I write a book. Hmm. I can always self-publish; but, my goal for writing a book would be to make bony, which is not what the goal to writing should be. Then I can pursue listening to the 20 or so books-on-tape that I have, or the 20 or more Kindle for Mac books that I’ve downloaded.

My husband wants a website. I’ve taken an internet marketing class which taught us that, so I can create a site, load his portfolio; all we have to do is find a host. Already, I can see TOO MANY THING THAT WOULD KEEP ME BUSY 😎

Unfortunately, as a child, I developed hobbies that reflected my former level of activity. I was active then and until I was 50 or so. I kayaked in Lake Michigan, biked along Lake Shore Drive, skied the Rocky Mountains and hiked. So, thus will be a venture, a venture into my soul, but I invite you to join me and create your own path. I’ll probably stumble and fall a few times, deciding that knitting is for me and trying it, only to find out that I don’t have the patience. But as of today, 3-23-2014, I commit to the search for new hobbies and new meaning to my life.

My challenger shall remain anonymous and may not be satisfied, but from now on, THIS IS MY LIFE!

 

 

 

 

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